Killing It In My Sixties

Do you ever have those moments, days, weeks, or years that feel like a never-ending doomsday? Maybe you got a flat tire on the way to work, or the suspicious-tasting salmon-skin sushi roll last night, landed you in the bathroom until the wee hours of the morning.  Or you keep getting sick; virus after virus, until you end up with a serious infection.  Maybe you get laid off from your job – right before the holidays, or you are passed over for a promotion when you were certain that you had earned it.  It’s often a time like this, that someone will say, “everything happens for a reason” – which doesn’t feel so great and is, to be honest, not super helpful or welcome.

Conversely, have you ever just taken a brief pause in a moment of joy or pure satisfaction, and thought, “Wow – I am right where I am supposed to be right now and I am so grateful”?  Maybe you are out at Happy Hour with your girlfriends on Friday Night after a long hard work week, and you are laughing hysterically about something someone said. Or maybe you are tucked under a soft warm blanket on your comfy couch, on a rainy day, binge-watching a new Netflix series you’ve been anticipating.  Or maybe it’s a day where you help a student through a crisis and they come back the next day to hug and thank you for your support.  Those are the times when I sigh a rewarding exhale of satisfaction, knowing.. that I am exactly where I am meant to be.  Literally – that God has placed me at the precise location that he intended.

I have gone through some uncomfortable times, if not completely miserable stages of life, that have left me wondering what I did to deserve the agony.  But when looking back, I can connect the dots that have led me to a better place and often – a situation I would not have chosen on my own.  I have been laid off from jobs that I literally hated, but did not have the courage to leave them of my own accord.  I have lost out on a bidding war for a home purchase, only to be rewarded by finding a far superior property.  I have had difficult financial situations that have put me on a path of a disciplined budget that resulted in greater monetary stability.  I have some failed marriages in my rearview mirror, but I finally discovered that I absolutely love the single life I have now – all of it: being alone, doing what I want-when I want, and having the freedom to pursue my dreams – both big and small.

I write about realizing the beauty of being right where you are, after acknowledging the many years of my life that I have spent trying to control or orchestrate an outcome for myself.  Chasing love, pursuing high-powered stressful jobs, believing that if I behave ‘just right’ the world will reward me with what I think I deserve.  Instead – I was often dropped straight on my ass – no warning and no cushion!  I think once we can begin to realize how very little control we really have – then – and only then – can we let our guard down and enjoy the moments.

One of my favorite quotes is, “That which is meant for you – will not pass you by”, and I feel like – if you slow down and notice the wonderful, beautiful, satisfying moments of contentment – you start to notice how beautiful your life really is. AND THAT – YOU ARE EXACTLY WHERE YOU ARE MEANT TO BE.